Be Grateful to Everyone

Gratitude does not seem to be that front and central nowadays. Instead of appreciating what we have, we keep focusing on what we do not have. We are filled with grudges and resentments and have strong opinions about what we deserve and what is our due. We may be taught to say “Please” and “Thank you,” but what have we been taught about appreciation? In our commodified world, we see things as material for our consumption. We don’t ask, we just take. And in the blindness of our wealth and privilege, we don’t see how much we have to be grateful for. We take all that we have for granted and we live in a very ungrateful world... I think we need to work on our basic gratitude, first. Simply adding this dimension to the way we view things would be a great improvement.

- Judy Lief, "Train Your Mind: Be Grateful to Everyone"

Received as Daily Dharma from Tricycle.com on the 25th of December 2010

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And gratitude takes practice. We started a gratitude practice in our family a while back now: at every meal we all hold hands and each share something we are grateful for. We usually eat together at the table and this helps us to slow down and connect, it helps our time together and our eating to be more mindful. Sometimes we are grateful for the food, sometimes for each other, sometimes for something planned but yet to happen, after a little practice it's easy to find something to be grateful for. After all, the very fact that we can sit together and share a meal means we that have so very much to be grateful for.

Humility: Breath is Truth

Some people practice throughout their entire lives just by paying attention to breathing. Everything that is true about anything is true about breath: it's impermanent; it arises and it passes away. Yet if you didn't breathe, you would become uncomfortable; so then you would take in a big inhalation and feel comfortable again. But if you hold onto the breath, it's no longer comfortable, so you have to breathe out again. All the time shifting, shifting.

- Sylvia Boorstein, "Body as Body"

Received as Daily Dharma from Tricycle.com on the 27th of December 2010

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A gentle nudge towards humility - we don't need a special and challenging Gongan (Koan) or Huatou, we don't need bells and gongs, we don't need to sit in a special posture - we have everything we need in this body to practice and to wake up.

Is enlightenment possible for laypeople?

Often we feel our everyday secular lives are in conflict with our pursuit of the teachings. How possible is it really for one who goes to work every day, has demanding familial obligations, lives among countless distractions?...

If somebody renounces the world, lives in a monastery, and studies the Buddhist teachings, they become learned and a very gentle, accomplished person; that’s... not very surprising. That’s their job; that’s what they spend all their time on. But if a layperson receives the pithy instructions on how to be able to practice the heart of the Buddha’s teachings during daily life situations, and then with sincerity and perseverance practices that, in every single moment, with mindfulness and with some kind of real integrity, and then achieves awakening while taking care of obligations, one’s duties, and one’s family, and so forth, that is truly surprising, because that’s difficult. And yet there are the profound instructions of Mahamudra and Dzogchen that are designed in such a way so that this is possible. As a matter of fact, there have been a huge number of laypeople in India and in Tibet who not only attained levels of enlightenment, in other words, became really accomplished, but also some who, at the time of death, left behind what is called the “rainbow body” as a manifest sign of complete enlightenment.

- Chokyi Nyima Rinpoche, "Keeping a Good Heart"

Received as Daily Dharma from Tricycle.com on the 14th of December 2010

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Good news then for all lay practitioners, it's hard work but it's possible. Keep on practicing with sincerity and perseverance, mindfulness and integrity.

Action: Get Up #Reverb10

December 13: Action
When it comes to aspirations, it’s not about ideas. It’s about making ideas happen. What’s your next step?
(Author: Scott Belsky)

Get Up.

It's easy to lie in bed and think. Thoughts take over, fantasy pervades, the morning passes by. Well not the whole morning necessarily, but maybe 5 or 10 precious minutes. Getting up before the thoughts take control is always the next step upon waking.

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I'm participating in Reverb10 and reflecting on my Dharma practice (i.e. life!) in 2010 as explained briefly in a previous post. Feel free to join in on your blog and/or add your comments on my reflections.

Body Integration #Reverb10

December 12: Body Integration
This year, when did you feel the most integrated with your body? Did you have a moment where there wasn’t mind and body, but simply a cohesive YOU, alive and present?
(Author: Patrick Reynolds)

Prostrating. One at a time, one hundred and eight times, head down, palms up, releasing.

Stillness, movement, being. Mindfulness.

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I'm participating in Reverb10 and reflecting on my Dharma practice (i.e. life!) in 2010 as explained briefly in a previous post. Feel free to join in on your blog and/or add your comments on my reflections.

11 Things - Get Real #Reverb

December 11: 11 Things
What are 11 things your life doesn’t need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life?
(Author: Sam Davidson)

I don't know about 11 things per se. However I have found through this Reverb10 journey that there are probably 11 minutes (or considerably more) of internet time that I don't need to spend online and could do with eliminating. There are whole thought processes that spiral along from one internet dot to another internet dot, connecting and making all sorts of pattens.

Not only does time spent online take up time that could be spent more closely with family, formal practice, reading real books, washing the dishes, etc. (moments of quiet joy where we can touch reality, unvarnished by thoughts or fantasies of it being any way other than it is), it also feeds these spiralling thought processes that take attention away from moment by moment awareness.

There is so much information on the internet these days and so many interesting and good things to read and places to interact with other people online. But actually I'm not convinced that being online so much is necessary or that it is contributing to my quality of life. I'm not sure I'm being useful, or of service, by being online.

Everett Bogue wrote about "mindfulness training for the digital self" which hints at similar things, although he has his particular take on the "digital self". And there are also people such as Gwen Bell and Tammy Strobel advocating "Digital Sabbaticals". These are interesting and useful reflections, but still predicated on a necessity of being online. I don't see that this really applies to my Dharma practice.

So in 2011, I plan to reduce and re-focus my online time and presence, to allow more time to get real.

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I'm participating in Reverb10 and reflecting on my Dharma practice (i.e. life!) in 2010 as explained briefly in a previous post. Feel free to join in on your blog and/or add your comments on my reflections.

Party #Reverb10

December 9: Party
Prompt: Party. What social gathering rocked your socks off in 2010? Describe the people, music, food, drink, clothes, shenanigans.
(Author: Shauna Reid)

I can't say I've attended any Dharma party or practise related party this year! I did, however, attend an evening with a meditation group where Dr John Crook, first Western Dharma Heir of Master Sheng Yen and teacher of the Western Chan Fellowship gave a talk.

Two things stuck with me.

Firstly, he gave time to each question and answered each directly and fully. For example, my 9yo son who came along asked him a variety of questions such as "Is sleeping meditation?"; "What is your favourite animal?"; "Why do people use candles when they meditate?" He answered each of these questions with as much sincerity and engagement as he answered the detailed questions from adults about Buddhism and meditation techniques.

Secondly, the talking wasn't it. Being around him has a certain indescribable quality. And he returned a number of times to the question: "What is this?" Gesturing each time to the space of the present moment. Each time the room fell silent, a deeper silence than just a lack of noise. If we wake up, open our eyes, be present, what is this?

It was an enjoyable and touching evening, John is a wonderful teacher and an inspiring person to spend time with. I am always deeply grateful for the opportunity to receive his teaching and to simply enjoy his company.

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I'm participating in Reverb10 and reflecting on my Dharma practice (i.e. life!) in 2010 as explained briefly in a previous post. Feel free to join in on your blog and/or add your comments on my reflections.

Beautifully Different #Reverb10

December 8: Beautifully Different.
Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different – you’ll find they’re what make you beautiful
(Author: Karen Walrond)

Or not. Reflecting on what makes me different brings me full circle to an understanding that all the times I see myself as different are all the times I create a sense of separation. A false sense.

Facing this was part of my practice in 2010 and continues to be. Giving up the story that I am somehow unique, somehow more deserving, somehow special, somehow different.

People light up when they can see and feel that you are truly present. When you aren't being separate.

First, give up the story of being different. Let it go. Put it down.

Second, be present.

Third, practise.

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I'm participating in Reverb10 and reflecting on my Dharma practice (i.e. life!) in 2010 as explained briefly in a previous post. Feel free to join in on your blog and/or add your comments on my reflections.

Exploring Sangha #Reverb10

December 7: Community
Prompt: Community. Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010? What community would you like to join, create or more deeply connect with in 2011?
(Author: Cali Harris)

My explorations of Sangha online and in real life during 2010 do not seem to have amounted to anything specific on first glance.

I am a fellow of The Western Chan Fellowship but because the nearest group is over 20 miles away I very rarely connect with them or attend the meditation evenings. I aim to attend at least one retreat with them each year, but for various reasons haven't in 2010. There are some other local Buddhist groups, but I haven't discovered any yet that I feel moved to participate with.

I also read a few Buddhist blogs such as Ox Herding, Cheerio Road, Jade Mountains, Zen - the Possible Way and Mountain Practice (from my blog list on the right), some more religiously than others (could resist sorry!) I occasionally comment on these blogs and connect with some of the author/practitioners via twitter.

My wife and I practice together now and then, and we share the same practice space, so in a sense the other is always present when we practice even if they aren't physically there. We are Dharma partners as well as life partners, something I am deeply grateful for. And I'm clear that my family is the most important community that I am part of, it is the very foundation that my life springs from, it is where my daily life and practice are grounded.

So what to make of it all? Of this web of loose communities I relate to?

Am I really a solo practitioner without Sangha?

Perhaps I am, I certainly value my solitude highly.

And yet, reflecting on this tonight, I don't really see myself as a Sangha-less solo practitioner. True enough that through much of 2010 I have practised physically on my own. But even then, even when I sit alone in a room, even alone in the house sometimes, I am sitting with all those who also practice. I sit with those I've mentioned above, I sit with the esteemed masters I've only ever read about, right back to Siddhārtha Gautama, the Buddha, and with all the other countless unknown beings also practising awakening.

We can think we are alone, solo practitioners. Our surroundings, feelings and thoughts can conspire to support this view. But really we can't escape, when we practise, we are part of the Sangha. We are part of the living, breathing community of all beings. We simply can't do it alone. We practise together with all those from the past, the future and the present. They support our practise as we support theirs. As we awaken, they awaken, and as they awaken, we awaken.

There is no alone.

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I'm participating in Reverb10 and reflecting on my Dharma practice (i.e. life!) in 2010 as explained briefly in a previous post. Feel free to join in on your blog and/or add your comments on my reflections.

Make #Reverb10

December 6: Make.
What was the last thing you made? What materials did you use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time for it?
(Author: Gretchen Rubin)

Christmas cards!



We used plain white card, felt tip pens, plain pencils and coloured pencils too! It was a family occasion around the living room table and a way to practice mindfulness together while expressing our gratitude and loving kindness towards family members that live far away.

Moments like these are precious opportunities to wake up. No need to have expensive toys or entertainment, no need for special postures, incense or chanting. Pay attention, be present, breathe, place the felt tip onto the paper: draw. Ah.


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I'm participating in Reverb10 and reflecting on my Dharma practice (i.e. life!) in 2010 as explained briefly in a previous post. Feel free to join in on your blog and/or add your comments on my reflections.

Let Go #Reverb10

December 5: Let Go.
What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why
(Author: Alice Bradley)

I let go of the need to live in the countryside.

It's a bit of a strange realisation but it's true. We still live on the outskirts of a very small city, but now we are within walking and cycling distance of my rural work and all the amenities of the city.

I previously valued living in a small rural hamlet (8 houses within sight) for the sense of isolation and direct connection to nature. I loved the view of the stars and moon at night, the sunrise and the sunset, and the gorgeous hills during the day. I loved the sense of space and how green the surroundings were. (There was still a noisy road in front of the house so it's wasn't quite perfect!) I was in a space of so much beauty and wonder to meditate within and draw inspiration from.

Earlier this year we decided to downsize and move to the edge of the city. It was a bit of a hard decision in many ways and it probably took several months or longer for me to actually feel ready to do so. I needed to let go. And it took time. There were many intellectual arguments I had with myself about the advantages of each location and house size. But in the end the intellect can only ever go so far and then we must go beyond by letting go.

And so I did and we moved.

And it has been great, the stars and the moon are still my early morning company. It's traffic and train noises in the earlier hours now rather than roosters though! And we still have plenty of direct contact with nature including walking more.

And in meditation the view out is different now but the view in remains the same, although both are in fact, ever changing.

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I'm participating in Reverb10 and reflecting on my Dharma practice (i.e. life!) in 2010 as explained briefly in a previous post. Feel free to join in on your blog and/or add your comments on my reflections.

A Sense of Wonder #Reverb10

December 4: Wonder.
How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in your life this year?
(Author: Jeffrey Davis)

I got up early. Which for me is 5:30am. Everyday, including weekends. It's not an easy habit to form but once I got into the swing of it, it did become easier.

Regardless of the day's commitments or weather, I got up at 5:30am and went outside to exercise briefly. On clear mornings I would gaze at the stars and the moon when she made an appearance! On other mornings and in other weather I would still breathe in the experience of being alive and outdoors in the early morning.

After exercising I would go indoors for my morning practice.

In 2011, I intend to continue getting up early. I see it as a lifelong habit really.

OK, I'll admit, sometimes when I'm really tired or get ill, I don't get up at 5:30am. Sometimes it's 6:30am and sometimes much, much later. But my intention is to get up at 5:30am every morning and I'd say around 90% of the time I do.

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I'm participating in Reverb10 and reflecting on my Dharma practice (i.e. life!) in 2010 as explained briefly in a previous post. Feel free to join in on your blog and/or add your comments on my reflections.

Feeling Alive #Reverb10

December 3: Moment.
Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors).
(Author: Ali Edwards)

OK, I'll admit upfront my "getting it right" tendency means I find it quite hard to find one moment during which I felt the most alive. So setting that aside, there were many moments when I felt a great sense of aliveness. One that has occurred several times and I always treasure, is the moment after an evening meditation session together with my wife.

The intimate warmth of our upstairs room, soft carpet underfoot, soft candlelight flickering, the waft of Sandalwood incense, her luminous dark eyes meeting mine after we have bowed to each other. And then embracing, warm, close, her hair tickling my nose, our heartbeats mingling.

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I'm participating in Reverb10 and reflecting on my Dharma practice (i.e. life!) in 2010 as explained briefly in a previous post. Feel free to join in on your blog and/or add your comments on my reflections.

Eliminate comfortableness #Reverb10

December 2: Writing.
What do you do each day that doesn’t contribute to your writing — and can you eliminate it?
(Author: Leo Babauta)

So... to reinterpret this, what do I do each day that doesn't contribute to my Dharma practice that I can eliminate?

Good question and even though I am loath to admit it and even publish it in writing, I think my answer is: comfortableness.

Almost everyday I let myself relax my mind in a lazy and comfortable way when I am meditating. I enjoy being comfortable while meditating, sitting still, being quiet, the body and mind held gently... and slipping over from holding gently to sitting comfortably. Staying in familiar territory, not going beyond the known into the unknown, not venturing into the zone of beginners mind, of fresh and alert awareness.

People often think meditation is a kind of relaxation and indeed some forms of meditation might well be, but Chan ('Chinese Zen') Meditation is actually a rigorous discipline, a strength training for the mind, for awareness, for letting go. It can produce a great deal of relaxation in life, in the sense that many situations can be experienced with a whole lot less tension or stress, but it's not relaxing in the sense of being lazy, sloppy and not-bothered about making an effort.

Chan meditation is about being alert and focussed in a gentle, mindful and precise way, not holding anything too tightly, but not leaving the method either. It is not about slipping away into some other warm comfortable, floating, detached kind of space. And if I'm honest with myself, I often do allow myself to be lazy and comfortable in meditation, enjoying the familiarity of it.

So from tomorrow, more focus on the meditation method, more rigour, brighter awareness and less comfort.

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I'm participating in Reverb10 and reflecting on my Dharma practice (i.e. life!) in 2010 as explained briefly in a previous post. Feel free to join in on your blog and/or add your comments on my reflections.

One Word: Fulfilment #Reverb10

December 1 One Word.
Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you’re choosing that word. Now, imagine it’s one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you?
(Author: Gwen Bell)

2010 in one word: Fulfilment

My Dharma practice has been very much in the background throughout 2010. I didn't attend any retreats, I hardly ever went to any meditation groups, I didn't carry out any specific practice based poetry exercises (such as my Poetry Mala the previous year), I continued my daily practice attentively and diligently but without ever making anything particularly special out of it. In this sense it has simply provided the underlying framework for my daily life and also for the key events of the year. And from this perspective I feel a deep sense of fulfilment.

Not fulfilment in these sense that anything is finished and closed. But fulfilment in that no particular aspect of my life feels like it has a gap or key element missing. There were plenty of ups and downs over the year. Plenty of joy and sorrow. And yet it doesn't feel like there is anything missing.


Imagining 2011 in one word: Leadership

I would like to take my Dharma practice a step up in the next year and explore how to be a leader in some way. It might be through further writing on here or my poetry blog, or it might be through starting a local sitting (meditation) group as my wife and I have pondered on a number of times. It might just be a clearer sense of leadership in my own life through the Dharma. It might be something totally different. it feels like the next step in a way though, a step out from my current comfort zone perhaps.

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I'm participating in Reverb10 and reflecting on my Dharma practice (i.e. life!) in 2010 as explained briefly in a previous post. Feel free to join in on your blog and/or add your comments on my reflections.